Review of MALL COP 2

by Simon on April 18, 2015 · 25 comments

After the first Mall Cop movie earned US$180 million worldwide, you had to expect that more would follow. Financed by Adam Sandler’s production company, and written by Nick Bakay and the film’s star Kevin James, the sequel may be utterly predictable and play blatantly on stereotypes and well-worn gags, but there’s something amiable and engaging about the character of Paul Blart – a kind of action-cop version of Homer Simpson.

Paul-Blart-Mall-Cop-2-PosterSix years on from the antics of the first movie, Blart (James) once again finds himself a single father. Still overweight, sporting a moustache and suffering from hypoglycaemia, he takes his equally large daughter Maya (Raini Rodriguez) to Las Vegas for a security guards’ convention being held in a swanky casino. Once there, he quickly irritates the general manager Divina (Daniella Alonso) and her Head of Security Eduardo (Eduardo Verastegui) but has the chance to redeem himself when he gets mixed up with a group of deadly international art thieves led by Vincent (Neal McDonough) who are in the middle of an elaborate heist of precious items from the casino – including one of Van Gogh’s Sunflowers.

The mindlessly silly plot and glitzy location are no more than an excuse for James to play out his affable brand of humour – mixing physical slapstick with a verbose running commentary of both grandiose and self-depreciating observations on life and himself. The funniest sketch for me was a completely unnecessary scene in which Blart is repeatedly attacked by a crowned-crane in a secluded outdoor piano bar: a ludicrous diversion while Maya is being held hostage at gunpoint by the bad guys. But it’s way more fun than the slow motion fight between Vincent’s suavely dressed goons and Blart’s bogan buddies: draw your stereotypes at ten paces. And the film’s ending makes a sad mockery of Alonso’s character Divina – the romantic interest who becomes so highly disposable it’s shameful. But, hey, this is the world of Adam Sandler, a man who has never cared what critics think and who just likes goofing around with his friends. Which about sums up the movie.  With Australian cinematographer Dean Semler behind the camera, it looks stunning, and the appearance of Mini Kiss – a tribute band made up of singers with dwarfism – adds to the general irreverence. Go with your silliest friends.

Rating: ★★★☆☆

{ 25 comments… read them below or add one }

Bubba Keen April 23, 2015 at 6:40 pm

The check from Sony cleared yet?


Jay Bee April 23, 2015 at 9:26 pm

You are a disgrace to your profession.


Paul April 23, 2015 at 10:57 pm

You are the only one among 42 critics to give this movie a positive review…were you paid to do so or did you actually enjoy a critically horrible movie?


c April 23, 2015 at 11:03 pm

youre a faggot


Truth April 23, 2015 at 11:03 pm

You’re an idiot.


pete April 23, 2015 at 11:58 pm

You ruined the 0%! A pox on you!


JB April 24, 2015 at 1:40 am

Congrats on being the one and only “fresh” review of this atrocity on rotten tomatoes haha


Concerned Citizen April 24, 2015 at 4:34 am

Hey – this was at 0% on Rotten Tomatoes…and you ruined it for everyone. Turd.


cdon April 24, 2015 at 7:23 am

Somebody’s always got to be all pretentious and spoil the fun for everyone else. At least you’ll get free stuff from the studio now. Maybe Sandler will let you be one of his friends too!


Dip April 24, 2015 at 8:04 am

Really, 3 out of 5? I am curious as to what you rate movies that actually do deserve being reviewed?


Dillon Flynn April 24, 2015 at 8:57 am

SUBJECT: Shill Be Comin’ Round the Mountain When She Comes

BODY: You’re a shill for Sony Pictures.

With love and regards from a guy who’s also broke enough to take dirty Hollywood Money,
Dillon Flynn


Rod Beefsteak April 24, 2015 at 8:57 am

How dare you.


Adam April 24, 2015 at 9:33 am

Someone had to do it. Write a passable review for a film that appears to make the apocalypse more appealing and thereby stop it from keeping a 0% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. I thought 0 was literally a nice round number (some argue 0 is not a number but then some argue Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 is worth watching) and a perfect terrible score. But alas not to be it seems.


Paul April 24, 2015 at 10:14 am

You had to be THE GUY, didn’t you? Boo!!


Andy Gimar April 24, 2015 at 12:27 pm

How much did the studio pay you for this review?


Bakerman April 24, 2015 at 2:14 pm

3 stars? you can’t be serious. This will be a front runner for a razzie this year. You also used words like mindlessly, unnecessary, ludicrous, shameful, disposable, and irreverence. I guess that equals to 3 stars.


Danny Phantom April 24, 2015 at 3:31 pm

Way to ruin the perfect 0% on Rotten Tomatoes, asshole. How can you give this movie 3 stars


SettleItTheUsualWay April 24, 2015 at 4:43 pm

So how much did they pay you for this late entry, Simon?


Travis April 24, 2015 at 8:07 pm

I wonder how this guy feels knowing he’s literally the ONLY critic on Rotten Tomatoes to give this movie a positive review


Kermit Clambake April 24, 2015 at 8:54 pm

I just came here to see what a positive review of Paul Blart 2 looks like.


Ko April 25, 2015 at 2:50 pm

Dude. WTF. Were you celebrating 4:20 when watching this movie? Did you actually say “Go with your sillies friends”…implying that you think people should actually pay good money for this pile of steaming cow dung? Are you a Sony shill? If this is a three star movie how bad must a movie be to score worse than that? Ugh. I think you need to watch a couple of good movies and comedies and then apologize and rewrite this review.


Macncheese Whopperfries April 27, 2015 at 3:02 pm

I really hope that you fall on your face with your hands in your pockets. Friggen Idiot!!!!


Bill May 6, 2015 at 1:57 am

My wife and I saw it and were entertained. I agree with the three star rating.


Seneca Blounts May 8, 2015 at 11:53 pm

Thanks for your Honesty Simon Weaving, everyone else just want to jump on the bandwagon


Aj Golden May 10, 2015 at 1:55 am

Is it really so bad that someone has an opinion? On the bell
curve of moviegoer happiness, can’t someone be on the other end of the spectrum?


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